It is a common occurrence of women that seek Abortion care- they feel very alone. However, you are NOT alone! Abortion is one of the most common and safest out-patient medical procedures in the United States. Almost 40% of women in the U.S. have had at least one abortion by the time they have reached menopause. Despite this fact, most messages about abortion are centered on shame, regret and irresponsibility. Women who have abortions are teens and older women, already mothers or childless, single or married and everything in between. The reality is that the "face of abortion" is represented by women from "all walks of life."
Some years ago we started leaving journals in our aftercare rooms, and encouraged women to share their stories. What fills the pages of the journals is both inspiring and empowering, and we hope that through reading the diverse stories of our clients, greater understanding about reproductive choice can be achieved.
Regarding the Right to Choose:
"We, as humans, and especially as women, are given the power of CHOICE. It is when we use this wisely and out of the best interests for us all- we can fundamentally turn the roots of knowledge into the tree of wisdom."
"I traveled across the globe in order to be provided with a safe abortion. In Georgia- the country that I live- sexual and reproductive health is rarely discussed. Access to safe abortions is almost impossible. Aside from safe medical procedures, contraceptives are also difficult to obtain. The majority of the population is uninformed, and as a result, there are many children living in poverty within the family structure as well as in "children's homes." I feel fortunate that the decision I made is the result of education and access. I am certain that I want to terminate my pregnancy because I am not prepared to have a child at the moment. Today I have been trying to imagine what it must feel like for a woman that doesn't have the options that I do. It must be terrifying."
"When it came down to it, I knew that this is my own body and a major decision to make. Remember ladies that it's your life, your future and your decision."
"The level of comfort presented to me was unbelievable. From what our society portrays abortion to be-and what the actual procedure was really like- differs greatly in so many ways. I can't thank the staff at Blue Mountain Clinic enough. They turned what I thought would be a cold and impersonal procedure into a comfortable situation about me and my personal choices, thoughts and feelings. Thank you so much, I will be forever grateful! Hopefully a woman's right to make her own choices wont be stripped away because some bastard who has never encountered such hardship decides its "immoral". It is time for people to wake up and fight for our rights!"
"I am really happy with my decision because I know I am not ready to birth or raise a child. I have plans for my future, like finishing high school, and going to college. I needed to figure out what I wanted, and not what everyone else wanted. The pressure was strong from all directions, but when I looked into myself I knew what I wanted and needed to do."
"Thank you America for allowing women the power to control our lives, our bodies... I can't imagine having to look into fresh little eyes and handing another child over to someone else. I made a very responsible and well thought out decision."
"I was scared to come here, so afraid people would look down on me for what I was about to do. The protesters outside yelling- they made me feel horrible. They don't know anything! But as soon as I entered Blue Mountain Clinic all that changed... I felt supported, cared for and relieved by the loving staff here. I felt understood and I will walk out of here with my head up."
"PLEASE- if you can find a safe way to do so- create networks, create a discourse that will dismantle the socialized shame that so often surrounds this experience. This is a difficult and complicated decision but NOT a shameful one. Let's work to make the care and compassion we find here accessible in the world beyond Blue Mountain Clinic."
From the Male Perspective:
"For any men who read this: I am married in my early 30's to a wonderful wife. We never intended on having children and then became pregnant. Not being able to make the final decision on having an abortion or not was stressful although I kept quiet as I knew my position wasn't quite as difficult as my wife's. For two weeks all our goals, dreams and beliefs were shattered and moving on seemed impossible. We are closer and talked about a future we want as opposed to one we believed we understood. Now that the procedure is complete, we can move on. Today is a dark day with a woman I vowed to stay with forever, but many happy and wonderful days are to come. I was not parent material, as some people aren't. My focus can be on my strengths as can hers."
"The staff treated my girlfriend very well. Thank you."
On Parenting and Family Choices:
"This is for other women who are sitting in this chair who are, like me, married. My husband and I are planning to have children, but after a lot of soul searching have decided that this is not the time. We didn't know any other married couples who had made this choice. But the fact is, many couples make this choice and it just isn't discussed. We're looking forward to having a family in a few years and to experiencing pregnancy again- when we are excited about it!"
"Truly being able to love my son/daughter means sacrificing for a time when he/she could have a nice house, enough food, clothes, and a mother who is not still a child herself. I love you my little joy, and that is why for now we must part."
"As a mother of two wonderful children, we can't afford a third... I can barely give them what's wanted or needed other than food. I feel I did what was best. I want my two kids to go to college and have a better life than I did."
"This was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I have always wanted another child. But when I got pregnant this time it was under the wrong circumstances. It would have been overwhelming financially and emotionally due to the fact I am already a single mother. I wanted so very much to have another baby, just not this way!"
"As a mother of three, the feelings I had in finding out about this pregnancy were doubt, irresponsibility, selfishness, anger, sadness, and worry. I could go on and on about my feelings, but sometimes it's too difficult to put into words. I contemplated time and time again... what should I do? As my partner and I took the 2 hour drive to Blue Mountain Clinic we opened up more than ever about our feelings about what we were about to do. Like a nightmare, protesters stood at the gate with their judgments. As I entered Blue Mountain Clinic I was filled with peaceful, down to Earth individuals who really seemed to care."
"My 40th birthday is just 5 weeks away. I have a wonderful husband and two amazing little girls. I am finally beginning to 'get my groove back'. We have never considered having a third child. I knew that I could not happily go through another pregnancy/birth and first two years of raising a child. The mental and physical exhaustion are just too much. I know I would not be the mother I want to be to my two girls or the partner I want to be to my husband. The support and care here have been tremendous."
"I chose this decision based on the life situation I am currently in. I have a 15 month old son who is the most beautiful boy in the world. He brings nothing but joy into my life. I am 11 weeks pregnant, and the father does nothing but cause us pain and misery. After numerous visits to the hospital from physical abuse, I've decided to leave this man for my son and our well-being. I was already scared for the unborn child. We've been staying with friends and family, and I think I'll have a better chance of going at it alone without another baby on the way. Things are going to get a lot worse before they get better and I am so grateful for the support I have received here."
Kudos to the Staff of Blue Mountain Clinic:
"I want to thank the staff; they have all been amazing, so kind and informative. This has been such a hard thing for me to do, but having such a compassionate staff has really helped."
"I am very grateful for the staff of BMC. They made my experience as pleasant as possible. It's not an easy decision to make but I know it had to be made, as I am a single mother of three and trying to go to school to become a nurse. The clinic helped me with the funding for gas to get back home as I drove 9 hours to get here. It was worth it though for the excellent care I received."
"I very much appreciate BMC's staff for allowing women to make their own decisions about their bodies and lives."